The life of a short person is all fun and games until your height interferes with your ability to do your job or your step-stool breaks.

So here are 10 reasons short people should not be mechanics:

1. Being shorter than the hood of a lot of the trucks you work on; half the population in this town drives a truck. Trucks are big and I am not. Some of the trucks –  like mine – that are sitting on 35-inch tires with a 4-inch lift are incredibly hard to climb into, let alone reach the hood.I have incredible upper body strength from pulling myself up into those trucks.
2. Not being able to get tools off the top shelf; when the highest shelf in the shop stands at 6feet tall, and you stand at a whopping 5-foot-4, it can be quite difficult to grab certain tools. So you stand there on your tiptoes trying to reach something until one of your taller coworkers comes and gets the tool down for you – and then pats you on the head as if you are a small child.
3. Being used for your size; my size allows me to fit in places my gargantuan co-workers cannot. That means I’m lucky enough to get to be the person to lay under a vehicle and catch engine coolant, motor oil and any other fluids that might leak from the vehicle – while my co-workers stand up above and hold a flashlight. On the bright side, coolant is a great way to make your hair look glossy and it also minimizes frizz.
4. Having to use a step-stool for absolutely everything; I’m too short to reach the engine without one. Honestly, it’s really not that bad… until you’re loosening a bolt, shift your weight and then your step-stool slides across the floor – causing your life to flash before your eyes. I don’t think it’s healthy to be having heart attacks at my age.
5. Being too short to operate some of the tools; working a floor jack is very difficult when you aren’t tall enough to get good leverage. Sure, the jack is designed to lift up to 3,000 lbs. by a simple movement , but when the lever is longer than you are tall… it presents a problem.
6. Being called “cute” when you make a mistake or get oil on your face; tall people can’t call short people cute. It triggers us. In the mechanics industry, oil is a normal part of the dress code. You’re gonna get it on your face and probably everywhere else too. If people think it’s cute, then that means they won’t take you seriously. That’s bad. Seriously, if you think it’s “cute” then you’re really gonna think it’s cute when my ratchet becomes a permanent part of your anatomy. M’kay pumpkin?
7. Having the legs of a corgi dog; it makes it difficult to reach the gas pedal. Now I’m just spit-balling here but I’m pretty sure the gas pedal is required to make the car move. So the seats either need to be literally against the steering wheel, or I need to slouch in that seat so my legs will reach. But that presents a new problem; now I won’t be able to see over the dash. Being short is tough.
8. Having the reach of a T-rex; I can’t reach the exhaust manifold without climbing up and completely lying over the engine bay. I really like doing that. It’s so comfy. I especially enjoy the bruises that show up on my ribcage from laying on the valve cover. They really bring out my skin tone.
9. Unintentionally playing a game of  hide-and-seek with your co-workers; I’ve mastered this game. A lot of the equipment and tools in the shop are bigger than me. Especially when I’m  sitting on the floor doing brakes. Most truck tires – being taller than me – provide amazing hiding places. My coworkers lose me a lot.
10. Heightened emotional distress; emotions of short people are all compressed into a much smaller package. Ticking off a short person is like microwaving a potato without stabbing it with a fork first. They will explode. Typically, when things don’t go well at work or maybe that one coworker of yours keeps making jokes about your height…. Let’s just say it’s not always easy to keep your cool. So if you value your life, and don’t want a wrench thrown at you, I advise you to be nice to your short co-worker.